53 Things

It's that time of year again...new beginnings, solemn reflections, and even some resolutions. For over forty years I've lived on the cycle of schools, and it is a hard habit to shake. My mother was a teacher too, you see.

This year I've given a bit of thought about the rich life I've been fortunate to experience, and, for the first time, got that awful pang in my gut at the thought that my daughter may not be so fortunate. It is just an awful feeling, isn't it? I can guide and provide but the choices are ultimately hers to make. I thought about the experiences I want to give her, experiences that will help to shape the woman she will become. 

As we were in the car earlier today, I heard her ask her dear friend in the back seat if she knew what a lesbian is and then proceeded to matter-of-factly inform her nine-year-old friend that a lesbian is a "woman who likes women." They then pondered the word in Italian before moving on to other important things, like the number of hearts of a worm. And while her description could likely be a bit better, I was incredibly proud of her for having this discussion without judgement, without whispering, without giggling, without snickering. It's not a big deal...except that it is a big deal because we work so hard to keep her mind open to everyone and everything; it's part of the experience intended for her. It gives me hope.

...............

I stopped making to-do lists about eight years ago and haven't looked back as it has been liberating beyond belief.  Of course I'm procrastinating and rather than get my stuff together for the morning, for the exciting first day back, I finished this "to reflect" list that has been taunting me from my desktop for a couple of years. It's not profound, just a portrait of "where I am" today, a highlight of experiences that have shaped me, most in the past twelve years but others as far back as college...

1. Swam in the Blue Lagoon in Iceland
2. Earned an advanced degree
3. Sat in box seats for a ballet at Teatro San Carlo
4. Wrote a poem
5. Attended the Winter Olympics
6. Tasted aioli in Provence
7. Swam in the Mediterranean Sea
8. Volunteered
9. Crossed the Mississippi River on a ferry
10. Had beer in a cave in Prague
11. Went white water rafting on the Chattahoochee
12. Cried in a concentration camp
13. Water skied in a muddy river
14. Instantly understood unconditional love the moment I saw my girl
15. Visited Old Faithful
16. Crossed racial boundaries
17. Rode a gondola in Venice
18. Chaperoned a high school dance
19. Watched The Color Purple at The Kennedy Center
20. Ate raw oysters from the Gulf of Mexico
21. Coached t-ball
22. Sang “Do-Re-Mi” in the arbor in Salzburg
23. Ate French onion soup in Montmartre
24. Led 9^th graders to a love of Shakespeare
25. Gave birth; held my sister’s hand as she gave birth
26. Bathed in thermal waters on a volcanic island, Ischia
27. Taught myself photography
28. Caught crabs with chicken legs in Grand Isle, Louisiana
29. Made true friends as an adult
30. Went to a major league baseball game
31. Almost flunked out; made the Dean's List
32. Bought a house in Italy
33.  Saw the opera Carmen in an ancient Roman amphitheater in Verona
34. Collected sea glass in Vietri
35. Perfected salted caramels
36. Read all of Toni Morrison’s work
37. Crossed the Brooklyn Bridge on foot
38. Saw dolphins in the Atlantic Ocean at sunrise
39. Learned a foreign language (Okay...learn -ing)
40. Went to overnight summer camp
41. Sunbathed on a rocky beach in Croatia
42. Rode a horse through a forest in Arkansas
43. Started a book club
44. Hiked to the rim of Mount Vesuvius
45. Made Julia Child’s Beef Bourguignon
46. Visited Marie Laveau’s grave
47. Learned to clean fish
48. Road a horse-drawn carriage in Charleston, a streetcar in New Orleans
49. Hiked in an Alpine meadow
50. Ran a summer camp
51. Spent the night in the Smithsonian
52. Made nine high school yearbooks, always with amazing young people
53. Found true love

53 things.

Yet...I know I have miles to go before I sleep.

Buona Notte.
And Happy New Year.

xo

D